Ahhh…the notorious Frosh 15. New students arrive at school, fresh-faced and eager, like so many sitting ducks, unaware of its ominous presence looming over them. You may be one of the many who are thinking, “it’s not going to happen to me, I’ve been skinny my whole life!” Little do you know what awaits. You are facing a year of nutritionally dubious cafeteria food, pitas and pizza after a night in the Hub, the auto-fry platter at the QP, and, of course, a lot of beer.

Each of these on their own is a harmless, innocent indulgence. But together they become a fat-cell producing mechanism, and 15 pounds of frosh flab appears.

Admittedly, it doesn’t happen to everyone. I have a room-mate who eats ten Wunderbars a day, and you’d never know it. But it is easy to get a taste of the Frosh 15 to some degree. I came to Queen’s before my first year, all taut and oblivious, not realizing that soon I would not recognize my own ass for the padding that was disguising it. But fear not, young frosh, once you get to upper years and you can’t afford to eat anything but KD and no-name brand soup, the pounds will swiftly melt away. Until then, follow the next article’s plan of attack, and you should escape the clutches of the dreaded Frosh 15.